The msm and the rest of the world may have shifted their focus back on to 9/11 since this year is the 10th anniversary of that terrible day. However, a reminder (if one is needed) that the families of those we lost on 9/11 live with their loss - every.single.day.
A mother remembers Keith Fairben
Keith Fairben, 23, of Floral Park, was a paramedic with New York-Presbyterian Hospital. He died helping the injured in the south tower.
A mother remembersHis mother, Diane, said Fairben -- her only child -- "had a real gift" as a paramedic. A longtime member of the Floral Park Fire Department along with his father, Kenneth, he had a "rapport with patients that was quite extraordinary," she said.
At 6-foot-4, he was an imposing figure. "He looked like he could stomp on you, but he had the biggest heart," his mother said. "One of his friends said to me Keith was the only person in high school no one had anything bad to say about."...
Carol Gies of Merrick, whose firefighter husband Ronnie died in the attacks, says:
"You move on a lot, you move on tremendously," she said. "But not a day goes by that I don't think of my husband; not a day goes on that I don't think of Ronnie."
As everybody surely knows by now, this 9/11 - the tenth anniversary of that terrible day - there will be many ceremonies, both in small town communities, and at the sacred Ground Zero.
July 29, 2011, 1:13 pm
Obama and Bush to Visit New York for 9/11 Anniversary
The 10th anniversary of the Sept. 11 attacks will be a grand but subdued affair in New York City that will involve two presidents, poetry readings and visits by victims’ family members to the new memorial, Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg said Friday.
President Obama and his predecessor, former President George W. Bush, will attend, Mr. Bloomberg said in an appearance on WOR-AM (710). Former Gov. George E. Pataki of New York and former Mayor Rudolph W. Giuliani, who were in office during the attacks, will participate, as will Mr. Bloomberg, Gov. Andrew M. Cuomo of New York and Gov. Chris Christie of New Jersey.
Mr. Bloomberg said the officials would take turns reading quotations and poems to commemorate the day. The list of 9/11 victims will also be read in its entirety, and for the first time the annual recitation will also include the names of those who died in Northern Virginia and Pennsylvania.
“This cannot be political,” Mr. Bloomberg said. “No speeches whatsoever. It’s not an appropriate thing.”
The World Trade Center site will be accessible on Sept. 11 only to family members of those killed in the attacks; the memorial will open to the general public, by reservation, the next day. Officials have already received several hundred thousand reservations, and they expect several million more in the first year.
As I mentioned to someone last night, one of the enduring images for me of 9/11 - from my vantage point in a different time zone miles away from Ground Zero - was the unity, the common sense of purpose that reverberated from the steps of the World Trade Center and rippled around the world. Since that day, every issue connected with Ground Zero has become a flashpoint of vastly divergent opinions.
This year is no different. As more details are emerging about the official plans to commemorate 9/11, opinions on who should be there, what is an appropriate respectful way to honour those we lost, are - perhaps - being lost.
Diane Fairben is the mother of Keith Fairben, a paramedic who died on 9/11, saving others' lives:
These first responders are the people that looked for Keith and all the other people who were lost on 9/11. They were the people who carried out my son when he was found. How do I even begin to tell them what they did was above and beyond ? They should be there. Most get little, if any recognition for what they did that day, and in the weeks following., and many of them have health problems because of what they did. I understand that families from the 1993 WTC bombing are invited this year, but it is a large area where the memorial is held, and other than family members, the first responders should be there before anyone else.
Hard to argue with her logic.
Then I spoke to Jack Delaney for his take on this apparent slap in the face for the First Responders, some of the greatest Heroes of that day. Delaney was Director of Emergency Services at New York Presbyterian Hospital, Keith's boss, on 9/11.
Although recent articles have negatively portrayed the fact that rescue workers and survivors are not being invited to participate in the 10th anniversary ceremonies we need to take a step back and reflect upon the facts. Due to the massive ongoing construction projects and associated safety issues the size of the crowd must be limited. As it is the 10th anniversary there has been an overwhelming response from the families of those killed on 9/11 who wish to participate in the ceremony. As a rescuer who spent numerous hours at Ground Zero dedicated to the rescue and recovery efforts and trying beyond belief to recover anything for these families, I will gladly step aside and let them take "front row". As rescuers, we spent endless days at GZ dedicated to reuniting the remains of our fallen brothers and sisters with their loved-ones. I certainly hope that I am reflecting the emotions of fellow rescuers when saying that our commitment to the families of those lost on 9/11 is unwavering, and we only wish that we could do more to comfort them. I am thrilled beyond belief, that there has been such an overwhelming response on behalf of the families of our fallen and I assure you that, as rescuers, we will be there both spiritually and emotionally.
These are just two out of the thousands of opinions that are being voiced. I think Delaney nails it on the head when he says "we will be there both spiritually and emotionally."
Fact is, I DO think it more than fitting that President George W Bush will be in attendance. I also believe that as many families and connected personnel that want to attend, should be present at Ground Zero on 9/11/2011. The politicians, for whom it will be just another public engagement? Not so much! Yes, call me cynical.
Truth of the matter is, that much as we all would like to, we cannot all physically be at Ground Zero to share in the public Memorial for the Heroes of 9/11. However, I also believe - know in my heart that - even without a presence at any public gatherings, many, many of us will be there on 9/11 - spiritually and emotionally - just as we stand with the families of the Fallen, every single day of the year.
When the news started hitting social media sites late the other night that Osama bin Laden had been killed by a team of US SEALs, my heart immediately went to the families I know and love who were so personally affected by OBL's act of terrorism on American soil on September 11, 2001.
President Obama's announcement tonight is a symbolic and moral victory for all humanity. As the founder of Voices of September 11th, and the mother of Brad Fetchet who was killed in the World Trade Center in 2001, I want to express my gratitude to the President, the CIA, the military forces and all others who assisted. Tonight, as we think of all our 9/11 families, we also remember the families of all the troops and intelligence officers who gave their lives in pursuit of Al Qaeda and the man known as the architect of 9/11. It renews our faith that good can conquer evil and all people can breathe free.
Keep America Safe, another group born of that terrible day, put out this statement:
Today marks a major victory for the people of the United States and the forces of freedom and justice all over the world. We are grateful for the bravery of the Americans who raided the compound near Islamabad and killed Osama bin Laden. We are also grateful to the men and women of America's intelligence services who, through their interrogation of high-value detainees, developed the information that apparently led us to bin Laden. The war goes on and al Qaeda continues to plot and plan against us. We must remain vigilant and we must continue to provide our men and women in uniform and our intelligence professionals all the tools they need to fight and win this war. Today, especially, we remember the brave Americans who have given their lives in the service of our nation and the nearly 3,000 men, women and children who lost their lives on 9/11. Justice has been done.
Sincerely,
The Keep America Safe Board Of Directors
Liz Cheney Debra Burlingame Bill Kristol
Some Long Island families gave interviews to their local paper. Go here to read their shared reflections. Father of Todd "Let's Roll" Beamer gave a tv interview, video here. This Ain't Hell also has a column up called Perspectives, which quotes Debbie Lee, mother of Marc Lee:
May 2nd, 2011
Debbie Lee sent out an email last night. I won’t quote the whole thing, but I was struck by the wonderful candor. Also just watched her on HLN along with a representative of the 9/11 families.
I have gone through a scope of emotions this evening as I learned that Osama had been killed. I received a text from a friend, “we have Osama.” I told my son Kristofer to turn on the news. I listened as I heard that in fact Osama had been killed and that we had the body and had confirmed it was him. I screamed jubilant, joyous screams for justice. I began shaking and thought of my son Marc who willingly gave his life fighting the war on terror which was lead by despots like Osama Bin Laden and Sadaam Hussein. If it wouldn’t have been for Osama I would have my son...
As scant details were appearing online (and before POTUS released his own first official statement,) I called Ken Fairben, father of paramedic son Keith who we lost on 9/11. We talked, but since it was two friends talking, (and therefore obviously off the record,) I will not share that here. However, the next day I called Keith's mom Diane, and that was on the record, so I share her thoughts on OBL's death here. Diane said:
I'm okay, going through a mixed bag of emotions. Funny, I feel no reason for celebrating, I am afraid of the retaliation that will come. I always said it will make no difference if we kill him...it is far and widespread, and they will continue to carry out their attacks. It was a morale booster for sure for the military, and rightly so.,
Reminded that it was from intel they got from GITMO that led to this day.. The GITMO that Obama said he would close. In his speech Obama was pretty good. He zeroed in on the 9/11 families.
When I first saw pictures of Americans celebrating it bothered me at first. Ground Zero is sacred to me. But they were very respectful, and not at all like the celebrations that went on in the middle east after 9/11. I saw a lot of firemen there at Ground Zero and I felt better about it. But we all know this is not the end of the war. I am very afraid of retaliation.
In my neighbourhood everybody got there flags out; they are all flying the American flag.
What would Keith have been doing last night? He would have been out there, fists in the air, and in the bars celebrating. But for me, today? No, there is no closure.
Jack Delaney, Director of Emergency Services at New York Presbyterian Hospital, was Keith's boss on 9/11. He has his own personal harrowing story to tell of that day, which we will share another day, but we focussed on Keith for this piece:
I had just been home a short while when my son told me the news. Initially, I was relieved, and my next thought was that we had just totally annoyed the terrorists/OBL followers. I thought about post-9/11 middle east, and figure it was really going to piss them all off, seeing American celebrate.
Yes, I went down to Ground Zero, after grabbing a bottle of champagne. I went with one of my crew, and it was cops, Fire Dept, and some in military uniforms. It was very peaceful. Incredible. Breathtaking. Very emotional time.
I was thinking about OBL and how this day is a double-edged sword. He will now be viewed as a martyr, and his death will rejuvenate his followers. We need to pay close attention. Be prepared.
Keith? He would not be overjoyed at bin Laden's death. He was the type of gentle-man who did not believe in an eye for an eye. He was very forgiving.
Not really closure for the families, for any of us. No. Maybe a sense of justice.
Mickey Arnette is a Gold Star Mom. Mother of SSG Jason Arnette, who gave his all in Iraq on April, 1, 2007. (To read more on this Hero, go here) Jason - our very own 4 Star General- private family joke - rests in Arlington.
I have no idea how I am supposed to feel today. Do I jump with glee? I don't know. I feel kind of blah, in a daze. I do not want Obama to take credit for Osama's death. It is not about him. It is about our military who did this, and our military who have died to bring us to this day.
Is his death going to make a difference? Is this just the beginning? The kids are in more danger now than ever before.
No, Osama's death doesn't change anything for me. There is no closure. There will never be closure.
Obviously, all of our allies have been paying close attention to the events of the last few days. A member of one of our coalition partners, active duty military, gave me permission to share something he wrote after he heard the news. I shall call him "Anon" as per his request.
As England awakes on a fine spring morning with Royal wedding hangovers and a sense of normality returning, Prime Minister Cameron arrives on TV complete with bed hair to express his thoughts to a nation.
Images of a dead Bin laden float about the internet and America is alive with a party feeling, a feeling which is long over due after so many of her soldiers have given their lives freely post 9/11 in the pursuit of freedom and the war on terror.
But what now remains, the sensible Americans steel themselves for further trouble which is as inevitable as salt and vinegar on chips. As the less experienced Americans party at ground zero, Al Qaeda plan the next battle of the perceived crusade.
England welcomes the death with typical reserve, knowing that her already hard pressed intelligence agencies, Police Service's and Armed Forces deal not only with the international threat, home grown threat, but the resurgence of violence in Northern Ireland are going to be busy in the not too distant future. Very busy.
Meanwhile Monday bloody Monday continues with slaughter in Afghanistan as the spring onslaught begins, the Taliban blood lust raised by the news of their Spiritual leaders demise.
The cycle continues.
C'est la vie
Yes, the cycle does, indeed, continue, and anyone who believes that we can bring our troops home, and the the war is over - as I have heard suggested in some quarters - needs to pay closer attention, as Jack Delaney so rightly says. The death of OBL is, of course, a moral victory, but our troops' mission continues, until we can victoriously says: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Keeping all our deployed troops close to my heart. Standing with all our families of those who have given all in the ongoing global war on terror.
It was a chilly October day when mum Diane and dad Ken Fairben brought the newborn Keith home for the first time. Dad Ken remembers looking over at Diane holding Keith in her arms and being:
Terrified. Thrilled and petrified. So full of pride, I couldn't wait to show him off. This little munchkin is ours, and now we didn't have the safety net that we had in the hospital. This child is ours. It was overwhelming. I was frightened.
Keith Fairben was one of the first EMS on the scene on September 11, 2001 - EMS Unit "10 David" - and he is listed among the thousands of innocent Americans, and other nationalities, who lost their lives that day. Yes, his name is written forever within the lists of hallowed names, but when you ask Ken and Diane about Keith, it is as their precious son that they talk of him.
I first introduced my readers to Keith, Ken and Diane last year, when I wrote to honour and reflect on Keith's life. You can find that here. At that time, Diane shared a mother's love and memories. This year, Ken shared his father's heart, his Keith, with us all.
As Ken tells of the day that the baby Keith came home, his voice swells with pride, even as with all families adding a baby, there were challenges. Keith was not a good sleeper, was a colic-y baby, as Ken remembers well. Yes, Ken did get up in the night with him, but as a bus driver at the time, sleep was critical for him. Like all newborn babies who don't sleep, Keith was always most comfortable if you picked him up.
Ken tells the story of Keith's baptism which says all about those early days in the Fairben household.
The priest asked 'what do you name this child?'
Ken's reply: 'Depends if it is 2 in the morning or the middle of the day.'
This story also highlights the sense of humour that to this day is evident in the Fairben family.
According to Ken, once Keith settled down, he was a great baby, full of mischief, and always so much fun. He retells of him and Keith kicking balls around , playing baseball, or wrestling, and just fooling around, enjoying each other's company. One of the ongoing giggles among Ken, Keith and Diane was who Keith took after for his size, since Diane is short, and Keith towered over Ken. No, it wasn't the milkman, but they figure it must have been Keith's great uncle Eddy who was a giant of a man.
Ken and his brother were involved as volunteer firefighters in Floral Park, and Keith was only about eighteen months old when he was first taken to the firehouse, which is where the community spirit also shaped the man Keith would become.
The firehouse figures large in Keith's life:
This was Ken and Keith on one of Ken's birthdays. As Ken put it: "Eying the cake. Who gets it?"
Keith was 'horrible in school' (Ken's words) and his bedroom should have had a 'condemned' sign on it. Same with his school locker. Keith was asthmatic, and because of his size - as a 6/7th grader, he was 5'7" and 140lbs - the school football team was very interested in having him play for them. Keith instead went into baseball, which he loved, and the coaches were keen to keep him on the school team. Ken remembers hauling Keith along for a teacher parent conference because Keith had neglected to turn in work for a science teacher. Low grades meant no baseball team. After finding out that there were five labs not turned in, and that Keith would fail this course, Ken and Keith went to Keith's locker to find the lab reports that Keith swore he had done. Just as with his bedroom at home, the locker was a 'disaster', and no lab reports were to be found. Knowing that he had been given one week's grace period to turn in the missing lab reports in order to pass the course, Keith did it.
(Keith and Ken hanging out at the fire hall)
Ken remembers the time, when Keith was 18 years old, and he had planned one of those father and son big, rites of passage, moments. In the back of the firehall, Ken tells Keith that he is going to have a first beer with Keith.
Keith's reply:
"Dad, you've got to be kidding me!"
(Keith presenting Ken with his 25 year fire department service ring)
According to dad, Keith was an average, typical teenager, always on the go with a whole crowd of male and female friends who hung out together. Ken tells a story which describes just how loyal (and maybe naive) Keith could be when it came to his friends.
On a day when Ken and Diane had gone shopping, they came home to find an officer from the Floral Park Police Department waiting for them at the front door. The way Ken tells it, a friend had called Keith and asked for his help at an 'aunty's house.' Ever the loyal friend, Keith agreed, and got in his dad's car, drove over and sat outside waiting as the friend brought stuff out of the 'aunt's' house. Turns out, it was not an aunty's house at all; it was a robbery in progress and Keith was an unwitting accomplice.
Taken to the police station in handcuffs, by the time Ken and Diane get there, Keith is in a back room being questioned. When the detectives bring Keith out to meet with Ken and Diane, the cops, who are towered over by Keith, try and make light of it for Ken and Diane's sake. Laughing hysterically, they hand him over to Ken and Diane, after sharing that Keith has been very forthright in his answers, and no charges are being laid against him. Not so lucky for the others involved, who were apparently well known to the police. According to Ken, who laughs as he tells me this story, the only strike against Keith in the whole sorry episode, was that, according to one of the detectives, he was "dumb as dirt!" Once at home, Ken and Diane sat Keith down and talked to him, where the harshest penalty was Ken telling Keith that he had hurt his mother. But that was Keith: anything for a friend.
Ken shares another story, which also shows the very young Keith's innocence. When Keith was in 4th grade, one night at the dinner table he asks his mum and dad: "what's oral sex?'" Ken laughs as he remembers Diane leaving the table, and he explains to Keith "oral sex is when mummy tells daddy she loves him, and daddy tells mummy that he loves her, too. " To this day, Ken still marvels - and chuckles - that Keith bought that answer.
As Ken talks of this boy he loves so much, he describes an openly affectionate and loving family in small town America.. I ask if he and Keith ever had a 'birds and the bees father/son talk.' Ken says no, but that Keith lived what he saw around him every day; a family where hugs and kisses were the daily norm, always showing love and affection, and always, courtesy and respect for women; never dishonouring a woman. In his life cut short, Keith had only one serious girlfriend, and when that eventually ended, Keith carried on, as he always did, with his huge crowd of friends, a wiser young man.
Keith's mum Diane told me last year that Keith was so like his dad, and a love of helping others is so obviously something they shared. Ken describes Keith as having a 'gentleness, an ability to calm patients, a gift. He was always able to reassure patients that everything would be okay.' If you read last year's column about Keith, you will also remember VJ describing Keith as 'a natural.'
Ken describes a young man who also lived the creed: Give respect and you'll get respect, with not a prejudiced bone in his body. He tells two stories to illustrate the quintessential Keith:
One day, driving his Camarro, Keith was stopped by a policeman. As he was given a ticket for 'obstruction,' because of the many air freshener decals hanging in his car, Keith was very respectful.
Another time, Keith met an African American girl in the cleaners, and they became friends. Always respectful with no room for prejudice. Ken tells me that Keith was hugely respected by the police he worked with, who would often say: 'Thank God it's Keith' when he showed up on a rescue call.
The serious work Keith did, first as an EMT and later a paramedic, didn't ever quash his love of silliness, and good laughs. At a three day retreat that the FD went to a dude ranch, for a weekend of giggles, there was a softball game begun. Ken and Keith were on opposing teams.
I'll let Ken tell the story:
Keith was on 2nd base. Next batter hits to the outfield. Keith runs towards 3rd base and instead of staying there, decides to run 'home,' towards me. Runs straight into me and knocks me right over. Someone tells Keith: "You damn near killed your father!" to which Keith replies: "He was in my way!" You just never knew what to expect from Keith!
Just like his father, Keith had (has!) a sharp sense of humour, and could always see the funny side of situations. This served him well, especially in the work place. One time Keith was dispatched to a domestic situation. Taking the male into the kitchen to talk with him, Keith laughed as he tells Ken what the guy had said to him: She hit me with a smoothie. [Ken had to explain to me what a 'smoothie' is. Before he did, I still found this one funny. ] As with most who work in such service professions, Keith has a very sick sense of humour. For all who see the darker side of humanity in their chosen professions, such humour is a safety valve, and Ken shared more than a few 'Keith stories' with me, that show a young man who loved to laugh. Ken: 'Keith made light of everything. It was all a giggle.' Another classic that lives on, is the time Keith and his co-workers greased the door handle of boss Jack Delaney's office. Ken stresses though, that Keith never, ever, lost his sense of compassion.
This is one of the few pictures of Ken, Diane and Keith together. Diane tells me Keith hated having his picture taken, but was always happy to be the photographer. This picture was taken in April, 2001, at the annual Communion Breakfast, a service is held to honour all those who have fallen in the line of duty the previous year.
Ken tells me that his son had to show him how to use technology. Always either on his cell phone, on the computer, Keith had to show Ken how to work his own new cell phone. Ken laughs as he retells that story, but his sorrow shows when he describes his last call with Keith on 9/11. It has been written of before:
... called him on his cell phone at 9:10, minutes after he heard about the plane crash. "I knew he would be there," he said. [...] He wasn't surprised when his son answered the phone and said: "Dad, I'm really busy. I'm at the World Trade Center. I can't talk now." Be safe, his father said. "Call us later." (source: Newsweek, September 20, 2001)
About that last call, Ken now says he wishes he had kept the same service, as he would give anything to hear his son's voice again. He called the server, to see if they could somehow retrieve those last few words - his last call with Keith - but they couldn't help, and Keith's cell phone has never been found.
The last time Ken got to be with his son one on one was a couple of days before 9/11. Ken called Keith and told him he was going into Manhattan. When he got there, he called Keith and they met at a street corner. They spent 5 to 10 minutes 'chewing the fat', and then Keith got a call and had to go.
After the early morning call on 9/11 when he told Keith "Be safe," Ken says he spent all day making light of events, being optimistic. He tells me that throughout that terrible day, he had no sense that Keith was gone. Even when Keith didn't call, Ken made a joke that he was probably in Krispy Kreme, a favourite hangout. Ken kept hope until two days later when, after a day of searching Ground Zero for Keith, he had to return home that night without Keith. A few days later Ken and Diane went over to the hospital where Keith worked. At New York Presbyterian Hospital, Jack Delaney (Keith's boss) took Ken aside while Diane was busy, and showed him Keith's ambulance. Ambulance Unit "10 David" was recovered and removed to NYPH. Ken says that when he saw it, he knew Keith was not coming home.
The values that Keith learned within his family, are those same core values he took into his work life. Initially after high school, he went to a local community college to take hotel and restaurant management, since Diane and Ken insisted he needed to find a direction to his life, a niche. As soon as he was old enough, Keith volunteered at the Floral Park Fire Department.. Going to school during the day and volunteering at night, he eventually transferred to the rescue company, and with a busy social life, Keith was constantly on the go. But it was within the rescue/medical area Keith found where he belonged, his niche, what he was destined to do:
...help people. He enrolled in an EMT course. and loved it. You gotta work at the EMT course. Very demanding, but Keith loved it. He would eat, sleep, breathe it.
That became his career, his passion, and he went on to be professionally trained as an EMT-P, who was highly regarded by all who knew him, or met him. Enrolled in paramedic school, which was 3 or 4 nights a week at North Shore University Hospital, Keith completed his training in May 2001. It was only after 9/11 that Ken and Diane found out just how well Keith had done in that course; very well, and passed with flying colours. Keith missed the ceremony, but Ken and Diane were presented with his parchment in a special ceremony.
There have been many ceremonies and many memorials since 9/11 which speak so loudly of how much Keith was loved - IS loved - and respected. Scholarships were also formed in Keith's name by Ken and Diane. (See more details on those here.) Ken and Diane also attended the commissioning of the USS New York last November:
The ship’s motto is Strength forged through sacrifice. Never Forget.
The ship is not only special because of its name; [ USS New York] it is also special because 24 tons of scrap steel from the World Trade Center was melted down in a foundry in Amite, La., to cast the ship’s bow-stem section, which is the foremost section of the hull on the water line that slices through the water. (More in my original column here)
One annual event is the Keith G Fairben Memorial Old Fashioned. I actually found a video of last year's fun and frolics:
That Keith is special is beyond doubt. To listen to anyone who loves him, or even met him just briefly, is to know that this young American hero touched many lives.
Ken:
...'picture him beside you, helping you. Even if you are a total stranger, he would have reached out to you. He had an amazing ability to forgive and forget. A true friend who truly cared. He had an ability to walk into any room and fit right in. People gravitate towards him...'
There is not a day goes by that Ken and Diane don't think of Keith, and they are vigilant in their determination to ensure that Keith is never forgotten by the rest of us. They ARE his voice. The community has also kept Keith alive with ongoing memorial events and lasting tributes. Within the FPFD there is Keith's locker - with his gear - which Ken sees, and talk to, every time he is there. There is Lieutenant Keith G Fairben Way, a street renamed in Keith's honour. There is a memorial garden, which the community came together to create:
Keith Fairben Memorial Garden (Floral Park)
Dedicated to: Keith Fairben Type of Memorial: Garden Location: Centennial Gardens Address: Raff Avenue & Floral Parkway City: Floral Park Description: A lovely garden planted in memory of Keith Fairben who perished on September 11, 2001. (From Voices of September 11th)
Diane:
'...that used to be a nasty sump, and through grants and donations and volunteers, it was made. Inside is a bridge that spans over a little low area, a bird garden, butterfly garden, and paths. People were invited to donate trees, benches, flowers, shrubs etc, and many did it in memory of others. Quite a few for Keith, enough so that they made that planting. It's actually outside the entrance to the gardens.
The gardens are on the other side of town, in Floral Park...Every spring I go and plant - only 'manly' colours like purple and orange. NO pinks, because Keith would be disgusted!'
There is a memorial rock set in front of Ken's company firehouse:
With heavy hearts Monday evening, the Floral Park community remembered and honored a fallen brother almost one year after the fateful day he made his last call. Members of Reliance Engine Company #2 unveiled a monument in 1st Lt. Keith Fairben's name Monday evening alongside Keith's parents, Ken and Diane.
Reliance Fire Co. in Floral Park unveiled a monument Monday evening in honor of 1st Lt. Keith Fairben, who lost his life last September 11. "Dedicated in memory of our fallen brother 1st Lieutenant Keith Fairben who made the supreme sacrifice 9/11/01" is inscribed on the monument.
Captain David Maickel said he'd never forget the sacrifice Fairben made that day. "There will be a permanent void in our hearts forever," he said. "Keith, we miss you. God speed."
Dozens of residents came out to pay tribute to a local hero said to be embracing someone he was trying to save when he was found. Fire Commissioner Tom Tweedy was in attendance, along with fellow trustees and Mayor Ann Corbett.
Rev. Albert Martin of Christ Evangelical Lutheran Church shared the thoughts he had when asked to attend the dedication. "I wish, Kenny and Diane, that we weren't here tonight because us being here means Keith is not," he said, "and the terrible pain we feel is a pain that continues to go on, day by day, as we remember him.
"But I'm also happy we're here. I'm happy that Keith was such a faithful and dedicated servant to the department. For a young man found embracing a person he was trying to save, he is now embraced by God's love."
In its traditional manner, the department honored four members who died over the past year, including Fairben, during a breakfast months back, which was followed by a brief ceremony at the firemen's monument (corner of Tulip Avenue and Caroline Place) and a Mass at Our Lady of Victory. The families of the honored firefighters were presented with plaques acknowledging the selfless service of their loved ones.
[...]
In addition to working with Reliance Engine Company #2, Fairben also served as a paramedic with New York-Columbia Presbyterian Hospital's Emergency Medical Services in Manhattan. Mayor Corbett recently welcomed Keith's mother as a new member of the Floral Park Fire Department.
First Assistant Chief Kloepfer spoke of Fairben's commitment to the Floral Park community, his humor and thoughtfulness, saying, "I'm proud to have worked alongside Keith."
There are also many online memorials for Keith, and to read any of the comments written, is to know how much Keith is loved. Here and here are just two of them.
Many people carry Keith in their hearts, every single day. At the top of this column are two tangible symbols of the ongoing love for Keith. I am honoured to constantly wear both the bracelet and the pin, as a reminder of the special bond shared with those who know and love Keith.
This precious son, who was such a gentle giant, also has a teddy bear that was created in his honour. Ken calls it the Keith and Mario bear because it honours both Keith and his partner that day, Mario Santoro, who was also lost on 9/11. (For a short piece on Mario, go here, or to learn more here and here. A combat medic also has a tribute page to the EMS heroes of that day here.)
To me, who never knew Keith while he was here, this teddy bear is the essence of him, and all he stands for. This 6'4 man, based on all I have learned about him, is the epitome of a gentle, always dependable teddy bear.
These are all very public memorials to a well-loved and cherished member of his community. Yes, Ken and Diane attend many of the public ceremonies, but no mistaking the pain in Ken's voice when he shares his private pain with me. I ask about God and whether Ken still has any faith in God:
I don't forgive God. He took one of the two most precious things in the world away from me. Keith was our gift from God, and He took him from us. I am angry and confused. WHY did God take Keith? I have asked priests, and they have no answers. Yes, I was raised a Catholic. One of the memorial services Diane and I went to, a priest stood at the altar and said 'we have to forgive, we have to heal our wounds,' but I do not forgive and I do not forget. Diane and I got up and walked out from that service.. There IS no healing for us. How do you celebrate? There are never going to be grandkids for us, there ARE no holidays, just an emptiness. There is never going to be 'closure', no 'getting over it and moving on,' as some have said to us. I know people mean well, but...I still have a faith in God, even though sometimes it is so hard. I pray that God has Keith safe in His arms.
Following 9/11, Knights of Columbus, a well established Catholic based organisation, honoured Keith in a blood drive, and were very supportive of Ken and Diane. Ken eventually joined them as a fully active member, to honour his son, and because, as he puts it: I wanted to give something back. Ken also recently again took part in a 9/11 Memorial Ride. He tells me he rides his motorbike - something he had never done before 9/11 - for Keith. And yes, he talks to Keith all along the hundreds of miles of the ride. He knows Keith rides with him.
Ken's motorbike is something he gets some comfort from. On those bad days, of which there many, Ken goes for long rides on his bike. When he needs to go be by himself, he rides. Ken and Diane have a rock solid marriage, but the passing of Keith does, of course, from time to time, become unbearable for both of them. Because they know each other so well, they know when hugs are needed, or when distance is the answer, and they both respect each other's way of handling the overwhelming sorrows.
Prior to 9/11, neither Ken nor Diane were too politically aware. As Ken tells it, yes, they followed local issues but that was it. Since 9/11, many families who lost loved ones that day have formed various groups. Ken and Diane are on a few of their mailing lists, to keep informed on matters relating to Keith. They rarely speak out publicly as some of the other 9/11 family members have chosen to do. They are not comfortable with that, and Ken says that is not what Keith would want them to do..
Back in October, 2001, Diane did give an interview to the Daily News:
MOM SEES HER SON'S BRACELET
By MAKI BECKER DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER
Monday, October 1th 2001, 2:23AM
You can't see his face in the photograph, but Diane Fairben says she can tell by a bracelet that it's her son, Keith, a paramedic.
"I recognized the silver bracelet," the New York City schoolteacher said from her home in Floral Park, L.I. "You can see his shirt. . . . Wherever that picture was taken, it was minutes or seconds before the collapse."
Keith Fairben, 24, is one of three paramedics from New York-Presbyterian Hospital among the missing in the World Trade Center disaster. The photo turned up in last week's Newsweek.
"At first, we had a lot of hope," she said. "But now, through the days, we've digested the reality of what's happening and what's not going to happen." (More here)
These days Diane chooses to stay away from the media spotlight, referring most enquiries to Ken. Recently though, both of them did agree to be part of a video ad organised by Keep America Safe, one of the most visible 9/11 families' groups. This video was their response to the current 'debate' about a planned muslim mosque at Ground Zero:
As Alison Vadhan, daughter of a Flight 93 passenger, says in this video:
As long as they need us, I'll continue to speak for them. I'll continue the fight they began.
And so it is for Ken and Diane. They DO speak for Keith, and will continue to do that, in their own low profile way. They went to GITMO to bear witness for Keith as the murderers responsible for 9/11 began a preliminary trial phase under the military commission. They have been to the White House, and saw AG Holder, as part of a group. Again, doing it for Keith. They have signed letters sent by 9/11 families to various politicians to voice their opposition to the BHO proposal to transfer these war criminals to civilian court. This is not a path they would have willingly chosen, but they are determined that Keith's voice will be heard.
I ask Ken about his favourite memories of Keith; memories he revisits in his worst moments, when he can find no solace. He tells the softball story, above, and also relates:
One time Diane, Keith and I went to the Bahamas. I am into scuba diving, and Keith was always willing to try anything. There we were diving together. Keith with his asthma was beginning to look uncomfortable. I held onto his bouyancy vest, and we were holding each other, looking into each others eyes. ...
...Keith would always leave me notes. I remember them, and still have one...
Ken laughs as he shares another precious memory:
One day, when we lived right across from the firehall, Keith ran out the front door with me right behind him as we were answering a call.
One of the kids from next door saw us and ran into his parents and said: 'Boy! Keith is in BIG trouble now. I just saw his dad chasing him, trying to catch him!
Both Ken and Diane have shared stories with me, which reaffirm for them that Keith is always close by. They feel him. He always gets blamed when it rains on official events in his honour, and they always ask him 'Did you have to make it rain, again, kid?' When anything unexpected - unplanned - happens, Keith gets blamed.
Every time Ken sees a penny on the sidewalk, he knows that is a sign from Keith, picks it up and says 'Thanks, bud.' Ken swears that Keith smiles at that.
Many of us see those who gave their lives on 9/11 as heroes. I ask Ken how he thinks Keith would feel about being called a hero.
Keith would say 'I am not a hero. I just wanted to able to help someone.' I don't think he would like being called a hero. He was just a caring human being, doing what he loved to do. I am embarrassed when people say that. Keith would be, too. But, I speak for him as I think he would want me to.
There is not one day goes by that Ken and Diane do not miss Keith, even as they know his spirit, the love that is him, will always live on. I also know this to be so, because Keith IS such a beloved American son who will always remain in the hearts of those who love him.
Thank YOU Ken and Diane for not only raising such an amazing young man, but sharing him with me. I promise you that Keith will be remembered. You, and Keith, all have my heart. Always.
Katy Soulas addresses students at Rae Kushner Yeshiva High School on Sept. 11. Her husband died in the attack on the World Trade Center in 2001.
Photos by Johanna Ginsberg (read more here or here)
Most of us take our families for granted, expecting them to always be here, a part of our lives every day. For the families pictured above, their lives changed forever on September 11, 2001. In the aftermath of 9/11, the loved ones of those above were rightly hailed as heroes. I originally wrote about Diane and Ken's precious son Keith here, and Lisa Beamer's husband Todd became a very visible face of the loss we all suffered. Katy Soulas, mother of six and wife of Tim - also lost on 9/11 - has also been written about here.
What all of these families share, but what I have not seen written about, is that they are all HEROES, every single day. I saw Diane quoted somewhere (or maybe she said it to me ;) ) as saying that heroes are ordinary people doing extraordinary things. Looking at those pictures, you could - perhaps - be excused for thinking you are looking at ordinary people, but they ARE heroes. On that morning eight years ago, each of the family members of the 9/11 heroes could have no idea of how the events that unfolded would change their lives. And since that day, Diane and Ken, Lisa Beamer, Katy Soulas and so many more, have daily proved that heroes do always walk among us. Having been priviledged to hear the hearts of Diane and Ken, for instance, I know that none of the families would have chosen to be forever linked to 9/11, but it is how they have chosen to live their lives, in honour of their loved ones, that shows such heroism. In the face of such enormous tragedy and loss, it would have been so easy for them to crawl into a hole and shut out the world, and who could judge them for that? Not I.
A friend of mine said recently that this era of heroism began on 9/11, and so it did, but there are many other heroes in this Global War on Terror. Daniel Pearl's parents are also heroes. Their hearts broke as they watched, with all of us, their son being murdered and that heinous act was broadcast around the world.
Judea and Ruth Pearl formed a foundation to promote those values which Daniel lived.
Check that out here. Many of the family heroes have worked on a daily basis to be a voice for the values that their loved ones lived. To the mainstream media, the heroes we have lost are just statistics, or fodder for the 15 second soundbite on the evening news, but for these families - heroes every one - every day sees new opportunities to ensure that the emphasis is on how their loved ones LIVED. They are the keepers of the legacy, and the living embodiment of the difference their loved ones made in the world.
Since 9/11, many other families have lived heroic lives with courage, grace and such dignity. From where I sit, it is the families of our fallen heroes who deserve enormous credit as heroes. In England, families of the fallen are now being given the Elizabeth Cross, which I wrote about here. All the American 9/11 families were given the Medal of Valor by President George W Bush - the civilian equivalent of the military Medal of Honor. Yes, that is appropriate recognition, but merely a small token of the heroic lives the families must now live minute by minute, day by day, for the rest of their lives.
I have been blessed to meet and come to love more than a few family heroes. I have shared their lives here on occasion. Robert and the Stokely family spring to mind:
I have had the priviledge of meeting Robert, who humbles me by calling me his 'friend.' Robert daily proves to me what a hero he is, as he heads up the Mike Stokely Foundation here, which works to maintain the legacy that his beloved son Mike lived for. You really should go and read about Mike's life at that link. Mike's sister, Abbey, is also a hero every single day.
Do not ever doubt, Abbey, that Mike is so proud of you. Never, ever, doubt that that you are a hero to me.
Deborah and Dave Tainsh are heroes to me, every single day. Yes, I have written about their son Patrick, and it is how Deb and Dave choose to honour Patrick's life that makes them heroes to me. Rather than quietly live their memories of Patrick, Deb and Dave honour the life of Patrick. Deb and Dave are extraordinary as they generously share their journey since Patrick's loss in Iraq on 2/11/04. Deb is a writer, public speaker and an advocate for all grieving families. You can find a list of some of her writings on Military.com here.
I have had the priviledge of sharing some of Deb's writing with you, and you can find those by putting her name in my search thing above, or going over to Tanker Bros (my first milblog 'home') here.
Deb and Dave, you are heroes to me, and I am always humbled by you calling me your friend.
I would be remiss if I did not share David Jeffers with you. I 'met' this Gold Star Father quite by 'coincidence', and how blessed I was. Back in September, 2007, I heard about his son Eddie who was killed serving his country. I felt compelled to write a public letter to Eddie, which said in part:
Dear Eddie,
Dear Eddie:
You didn't know me in the 23 years you were here, but I have been thinking a lot about you the last few days. Really, I have. This is not the first time I have thought of you, been aware of you. I remember back when your piece "Hope Rides Alone" became famous all over the internet. I know that piece of fine writing from the sandbox gave insights to many of how amazing all of you are, who are fighting today. I remember. I remember smiling because your words put the lie, yet again, to the notion that all soldiers are just killing machines, ignorant hick Rambos gone wild. And you kept fighting, and you kept writing, as the rest of us went on about our everyday business, doing whatever it is we all do, that is SO (sarcasm here) important.
And now? This last week has seen your work, again, all over the internet, and there has been much weeping and sorrow. I have read a lot of the stuff written about you and I feel as if I know you. I read with great sadness that you had died in Iraq. This human heart was heavy. But, as I have talked to people, re-read your writing, I have been so grateful to have been given a glimpse of you.
I got an email from your dad David, in response to an email I had sent to him, and I KNOW you are smiling down on him. Oh Eddie, I know you know the human dad is struggling with this loss, but you also know that he has faith to sustain him as he continues on his human path. Like you, he knows he is a child of God and he knows, as do I, that 'death' is no finality. I remember a long time ago reading somewhere that a way of looking at 'death' as we know it in our human realm, is that those gone before have just stepped into the next room; never far away. My prayer for your dad and all your family is that they always feel you close by. I know that the love we share, one with another in this classroom called "life", never dies, but lives on forever. I hope your family holds on to this truth in the times ahead.....(read the rest here, and meet Eddie's mum, dad and sisters)
David and Tina, you ARE heroes to me.
The list of my family heroes is long. Most of them will never be known to the general public, but I am honoured to be in some of their lives, albeit in a small way. There is Deborah Iverson May, widow of Don, and if you don't know who he is, you should. Again, head over to Tanker Bros and look at his picture on the left sidebar here. I have had the honour of writing about Don and Deborah a few times. Check out one such column here. Deborah is raising their three children, and make no mistake, those children are also heroes. As I have often said, the children also serve.
This picture is Don and Jack in April 2001, and yes, Jack has turned into quite the super star in his own right (Sorry, Deb! Threaten him with Aunty Brat.....)
Mickey Arnette Bryant is another one of my heroes. Mum of Jason, every single day she honours the life her son chose.
I last wrote about Mickey and her son Jason on the occasion of a local bridge being renamed the
SSG JASON R ARNETTE MEMORIAL BRIDGE. You can read more about that here.
Take a look at this video. Jason is the first face you see, and yes, every single person here has a family of heroes standing for them:
Be sure to go over to the site of the creator of this video here and read what he has to say. Mickey, you ARE a hero to me, every single day.
Cat Brooks is a hero of mine. You probably have no idea who she is, unless you are a regular reader of mine. Cat is the aunt of Sgt John Rode, who was remembered as part of the Run Forthe Fallen in 2008. Cat is also a Soldiers' Angel (which is how I first met her.) Cat is another family hero, who continues to work with our troops and their families as a way to honour her precious nephew. Back in August 2008, Cat graciously allowed me to share her thoughts and memories of her nephew John. Back then, I wrote - in part - :
Run for the Fallen is today remembering - and honouring - Sgt. John David Rode, 1st Battalion, 12th Cavalry Regiment, 3rd Brigade, 1st Cavalry Division. A hero among heroes. As with all our heroes, John is not only a hero to all of us; he is also the precious son of Cheryl and Tom Rode; beloved nephew to Cat and Eddie Brooks, and most gentle, awesome uncle to the children. John's family graciously shared their stories, their pictures of John, and it is my honour and priviledge to be allowed to share with you, through those who love John the most.
...
I am so sorry it has taken so long for me to get back to you...the real reason is every time I sit down to write I have so many memories flooding back and I don’t know where to begin....
Through his serious and tough exterior that he had adopted, he let us see the big kid he was still inside. He absolutely loved my kids with abandon and was not afraid to show it, often rolling on the floor and chasing them on the playground. His gentleness and awe of the little vulnerable baby that was presented to him when he met his little niece Izzy for the first time was precious. To see this big strong tough Soldier hold that baby with such tenderness and love was a glimpse into his soul. ..
I have often heard the question asked: Where do we find such heroes? I know the answer to that: it is in the families who raise these fine men and women; they each are a product of those who love them the most.
Family heroes - my heroes of this year, or any year - come from outside America, too. Judith Budd, mother of Shane Keating, is a Canadian. From Saskatoon, she held a news conference after her beloved son was killed in September 2006, serving his country:
A Saskatoon mother devastated by the loss of her soldier son in Afghanistan can also find meaning in his death.
Judith Budd spoke with reporters Thursday about Cpl. Shane Keating, who was killed along with three other Canadian soldiers at Kandahar when they were attacked by a suicide bomber earlier this week.
Judith Budd. (CBC)
"Nothing, nothing is worth the loss of a son, but everything, everything is worth a man actually being willing to take that risk and die for what be believes in," Budd said as family members stood next to her.
Budd said she fully supports Canada's role in Afghanistan. Her son was aware of the dangers and he knew how afraid she was for him, but he strongly believed in why he was going over there, she said.
"He said you can't just look at the individual because most of us will come home and the ones who don't have made a difference and it's worth it."
Cpl. Shane Keating was one of four Canadian soldiers killed in a suicide bombing in Afghanistan on Monday. (Canadian Press)
There is a video of Shane's mum speaking, and I urge you to watch it. Yes, it is painful to watch this mother's grief, but it IS absolute heroism in its finest form: I cannot embed it, but follow this link and spend some time with Judith Budd. Judith Budd is one of my heroes. One of the things she said that has always stuck with me?
"Those who love the world serve it in action..."
And these families all continue to serve the mission their loved ones served. Whether you see them on the front pages of the msm, be sure that these families all honour their loved ones. They serve in action, for the love of their family members.
I introduced you to Mishelle Brown last March. I wrote:
Mishelle Brown, widow of slain Warrant Officer Dennis Raymond Brown, holds a news conference in St. Catharines, Ont., on Wednesday, March 4, 2009. (Frank Gunn / THE CANADIAN PRESS)
My regular readers all know how much respect I have for the families of our troops. They also serve. I have just listened to a sound bite of a press conference Mishelle Brown did. She is the now widow of WO Dennis Brown who was killed by an IED in Afghanistan. (See my previous post.)...
We talked about everything . . . some people say, 'I wish I had one more thing to say to them,' but I said everything, I don't have to say one more thing, I said it all when he was alive," she told reporters in St. Catharines, Ont. "Everyday I spoke to him I reminded him how important he was to me and how lucky I was to have him."
She said they spoke only about the possibility he would die in Afghanistan.
"Dennis was a realist . . . he made me prepare for his death," she said, adding that they discussed with their four children what they would do if he died in the line of duty. "And boy, did we prepare."...
Brown's wife said she was told he was a hero, but that he was always "her hero."
Mishelle Brown said she wanted "the whole world to know what an amazing man he was."
"That's what's keeping me strong, I met my dream come true. Nobody can take that away from me. No roadside bomb can take that away from me. "(source: CTV.ca) (read the rest of that column here)
Mishelle, you ARE - and will always be - a hero to me.
Another Canadian you may never have heard about, but she is a hero nevertheless, is Maureen Eykelenboom. She is the mother of Andrew, "Boomer."
Through personal acts of kindness and compassion, Andrew and his comrades made a positive difference in the lives of men, women and especially children.
Today, Andrew's humanitarian spirit lives on through Boomer's Legacy.
Boomer's Legacy is an amazing ongoing homage to a truly special young man. Be sure and check out their site. Learn more about Andrew, and the work his family does to honour his memory here.
Maureen, you are a hero.
Just in these last few days, Canada has borne witness to yet another family hero. Private Garrett Chidley is one of the four fallen Canadian heroes on his way home to his loving family, and yes, grateful nation.
Cam Chidley said his son was proud to be in Afghanistan as part of the Canadian combat and reconstruction effort.
"He was proud and happy to go there. He worked hard to get there. He was proud of his buddies, proud of what he was up to," he said...
In November 2007, I wrote about some of these heroes who blog. You may have missed my column:
The Girl Behind the Man behind the Gun
The Girl Behind the Man Behind the Gun
by MacDonald, Wilson Pugsley, (b. 1880)
You have seen the line of khaki swinging grandly down the street,
You have heard the band blare out Britannic songs;
You have read a ton of papers and you've thrown them at your feet,
And your brain's a battlefield for fighting throngs.
You have cheered for Tommy Atkins, and you've yelled for Jack Canuck;
You have praised the French and Belgians, every one.
But I'm rhyming here a measure to the valor and the pluck
Of the Girl Behind the Man Behind the Gun.
There's a harder game than fighting; there's a deeper wound by far
Than the bayonet or the bullet ever tore.
And a patient, little woman wears upon her heart a scar
Which the lonesome years will keep for evermore.
There are bands and bugles crying and the horses madly ride,
And in passion are the trenches lost or won.
But SHE battles in the silence, with no comrade at her side,
Does the girl behind the man behind the gun.
Fact is, in every war there are women left behind on the homefront. In WW2, most of those women worked in munitions factories (Rosie Riveter anyone?) and in England, many of those "girl[s] behind the man ..." joined the Women's Land Army to make sure that food was still produced to feed a nation at war. The women in my family have shared many stories of their escapades in the WLA!
In this current war, women are - again - playing a vital role contributing to the war effort. Yes, women now are in the frontline combat roles, but there is also a group of women whose war efforts are every bit as critical as their sisters commanding tanks, machine guns, in the sandbox.
They are the wives, the mothers, the bloggers. Seems fitting to me that in this war, being fought on two fronts at home, (the msm and the rest of us..lol) women are writing about their lives as connected to the military. These women have a unique perspective, that the rest of us do not. Their contributions to the GWOT are every bit as vital as the man with the gun. I suspect the men with the guns would agree with me!... (read more about some of my family heroes - who continue to serve - here on Tanker Bros)
Another family member who is a hero to me is Mike "Moon" Mullens. I have shared his work with you all a few times. Mike is a friend, a Vietnam veteran, a writer, and the proud father of a son who is serving in the US military. Mike has graciously shared much of his own Vietnam experiences through his writing with me, and I have posted them here. He also has written about his experiences of being the home front hero as his son now serves:
Thank YOU, Mike. I don't think I have ever told you, but you are a hero to me in so many ways.
Another family hero recently came to my attention. Leila Hunt-Willingham is the sister of J D Hunt.. Jason Hunt was one of the 14 murdered in Ft Hood last month, and I gave a brief profile of him here:
Spc. Jason Dean Hunt,
Tipton, Oklahoma
As a boy, Jason Hunt once had to wear silver caps on his front teeth. When he was too timid to smile, his sister, playing on his love for video games, asked him to show his Ninja Turtle teeth.
"He was so embarrassed and such a shy boy," recalled his sister Leila Willingham, 30, of Frederick, Okla. "That was the only way I could make him smile." In high school, Hunt refused to dissect a cat for a class assignment. He was so upset that his mother had to pick him up from school.
But Hunt's shy and sensitive side was transformed, his family said, when he joined the military. His already caring nature bloomed into something brave, selfless and fearless, they said. He hoped to save somebody's life someday....
In August, he got married in Okalahoma City. "He had a blue tie and he was so happy to have his family there and to be becoming part of a family," his sister recalled through sobs.
Willingham recalled her brother once likened his feelings for his military family to the love a parent feels for their children.
"He said, 'I would die for your children.' He said, 'I would die for a stranger to save them.' And he said he would dive in front of a bullet for a soldier."...(here)
His sister is now writing her own blog. In her first post, she writes:
You may know about me. I'm a mom of 2 bright lights. A wife. A sister. A child of God. After my sweet (and only) brother was killed at Fort Hood on November 5, 2009, I sit here, feeling compelled to write about him.
My baby brother, Jason. JD is what I call him. But for the purpose of this blog, I am writing for "J." Sometimes I will be writing about my brother. Sometimes I will be writing to him. Sometimes I will be writing to and about the other "J" in my life - the most important. My savior, best friend and Comforter - Jesus.
This blog is not to creep people out or to attract any negativity. Just to heal. To grow. To listen to my Lord and find comfort in the darkest hour or joy in the brightest, and share it.
Thanks for visiting.
Yours and His,
~Leila
Leila has written a few great columns about her brother, and her own journey of healing. Go check it out here.
Even though the mainstream media will not tell you this, there are many families who are daily heroes. These are the families of those who are currently serving, who have deployed, or who are in the various sandboxes. More than a few of them I now number as friends: there is Donna (whose son Butch I profiled as one of my Every Day Heroes when he returned to Iraq on a second tour); Melinda, who is raising her children as her husband is deployed, Emily, whose husband CJ serves in oh so many ways; Deb, whose daughter signed on to serve her country; Mrs Master Gunner, whose husband first introduced me to milblogging (and look where it got us all....); Mrs Toy Soldier, who married into the Hooah family; Connie, whose family also serves; Carla and Janet, mum and mum-in-law of RJ, whose wife Lisa is another of my heroes.
Another Canadian military wife was also added to my list of heroes this past year. If you don't know Louise, you really should go and read her site: From The Home Front is a personal, oh so eloquent journal of this young wife and mother's challenges as her husband served in Afghanistan. Louise, you ARE a hero to me. Paula is an Israeli Soldier's Mother who shares her words and insights from the heart of a home front hero. Paula: Thank YOU! The list of family heroes, serving on the home front, would fill more than a few volumes, and I cannot list them all here.
When the history books are written of today's Global War on Terror, you may not see any of the family members I have introduced you to above. However, for me, every one of them is my hero, and their courage, grace and dignity is engraved on my heart - inspires me - and I will always honour them, as my Heroes of the Year, every year, forever. I WILL remember them, with gratitude, respect and love. Will you?
