Monday, December 13, 2010

Here comes Santa!




NORAD is tracking Santa again this year. This year there are all sorts of added features:

HOT UPDATES from the North Pole (changing each day of December)

NORAD officials have received notification that Santa has selected 9 reindeer for his yuletide trek around the world on Christmas Eve! These special reindeer have been on a rigorous exercise program to make sure they are physically fit for the journey! NORAD has learned that one of the reindeer has a bright shiny nose, and responds to the name Rudolph.

Mrs. Claus has informed NORAD that Santa’s “Naughty or Nice” list includes a record 1.9 billion children under the age of 15 this year. This list grows continually, as children are born at the rate of approximately 340,000 per day. Check the world’s current population at http://www.census.gov/ipc/www/popclockworld.html

Weather forecasters have predicted that the temperature at the North Pole on December 25 will be about -15 F (-26ÂșC). Brrrrrrr! Check current North Pole weather at http://www.weather.com/weather/local/99705?from=monthAvgGraph_topnav_undeclared

Using more than 1.6 billion cups of sugar, Santa’s elves have created 5 billion candy canes this year, to be hung on Christmas trees and slid into stockings. Mrs. Claus has informed us that Santa’s favorite candy-cane flavor is root beer (but he prefers peppermint with his hot cocoa).

Santa has reached his pre-Christmas target weight! After undertaking a regimen of restricting fat and exercising daily, Santa has trimmed down to a 210 pounds – substantially less than his landing weight of 1,260 lbs last year. Nevertheless, Mrs. Claus has assured us that Santa still has a belly that shakes like a bowlful of jelly when he laughs.

[...]

NORAD has learned that the closing ceremonies for the Reindeer Games have taken place at the North Pole. More than 48 reindeer participated this year. Challenges included take-off speed, freestyle sky-dancing, synchronized touch-and-go, and hoof patty-cake for the fawns.

Santa’s elves have finished installing the lights around Santa’s Workshop. As with the Jewish Festival of Light on Hanukkah, Christmas is a time to bring warmth and brightness into the world. Candles and lights are symbols of that spirit.

Santa’s Chief Elf, Kerstmis Fatato, has informed NORAD that Santa’s Workshop will use 1,123,595 ½ miles of ribbon to wrap gifts this year. Kerstmis encourages all children (grownups too) to reuse their ribbons on gifts throughout the year.

[...]

Faast Taukker, Santa’s Elf in press relations manager, has verified that Rudolph’s bright red nose is indeed very hot again this year – so bright in fact, that, in pre-flight tests, it registered 36,000 lumens! This is good news as it ensures NORAD officials that they once again will be able to detect Rudolph on Christmas Eve.

[...]

NORAD has learned that Vixen, one of the nine reindeer selected to be part of Santa’s Christmas Eve crew, has suffered a take-off injury to her magical levitation system during training. The good news is that, according to Dr. Fixeerstof van Elf, the chief veterinary elf at the North Pole, Vixen is expected to recuperate fully–and in plenty of time for her gift-delivery duties.



Keep your eye on Santa here.

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